Help This Woman Catch Her Cheating Husband Using a Cellphone

I get all sorts of interesting emails being part of a site like TechConsumer, but I’ve never gotten a request like this. A woman contacted me — we’ll call her Tina — and explained how her husband is cheating on her. She knows this because she took a peek at his cellphone and saw some rather questionable text messages from his new, uh, “friend.”

So what’s she hoping to find is a way to setup his phone (obviously while he’s unaware) so that it forwards his text messages (sent, received, or both) to her cellphone or email address (without him knowing).

It’s actually a rather sad story (as can often be the case with cheating husbands, I’m sure). And while she knows of the affair from her one sneek-a-peek, he’s also more on edge than usual. Another factor at play is the fact that she basically supports him financially and would rather just get the divorce over with (if this whole affair thing is as true as it appears).

So why did she email me, you may be wondering? Well, it can be hard to move forward with a divorce over a sneek-a-peek text message. So she went hunting for technological ways to get the affair documented and came across Computers.net. Of course, we didn’t have what she was looking for (none of the authors here have direct experience with this specific request, though we’ve blogged a couple times about various cellphone tracking options).

Thus, with her permission and with the understanding that I would protect her anonymity as best I can, I told her I could pose the question publicly and see if I might find an answer for her. Here’s part of one of her emails:

“My husband is cheating on me and is making plans to meet with his friend. He deletes her messages to him. Is there anyway I can have his text messages forwarded to my cell phone or e-mail address without his knowing about it from his phone. He has a Motorola phone. It is with his company [Cingular]… Can you give me any advise?”

So does anyone know of a way to do this relatively easily?

*Update* Another question might revolve around the legality of this kind of maneuver… For any of you lawyers out there, what does the law think of this?

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  • http://www.womansavers.com Janet

    There are tons of tips on how to catch a cheater on http://www.womansavers.com/catch-a-cheater.asp?menu=read

    The man probably does not only text this lady, but also phones her. I suggest placing a small, long recording, voice activated tape recorder under his car seat for a few days and then listening to it. I have known many women who have caught their partner cheating in this manner. However, please note that the woman should not give away her secret as to how she found out.

    Good luck.

  • Cory

    As far as text messaging go.

    I’m a former Cell Phone Company CSR (the guy who answers the phone after the half hour wait)

    I know that the company will carbon copy every text message to their site which you can access with a user name password. It only works with text messaging plans higher then the pay as you go. I’ll tell you that I’m not from Cingular but I’d suggest calling their customer service to see if they have an option like that.

    I helped setup a mother’s account so she could read EVERY inc/outgoing text message from her daughters phone or any phone on the account she held.

  • Heather

    I just called Cingular because I have good reason to need to see those messages, too. The CSR said that there was no way for me to view the actual message. Is that true, I wonder? I should’ve asked if I could view the number it is sent to or from, I guess.

  • michelle

    I am having the same problem as the woman with her cheating husband and the pay as you go cell phone. I been researching to find a way to see whats going on, i called the cell phone company and they refuse to tell me anything and i need to know his password. This all started last summer when i found out my hubby and my sister were talking with each other via cell phones. Words cannot describe how hurt i was to discover that! i thought things had stopped since i found out and he threw his phone away to proove he was not speaking to her anymore. Just recently i discovered a reciept and paper work for a new phone he had bought. when i asked him about it he said he lost the phone at work months ago. I called the number for the new phone and someone has been checking the voice mails. i dont know what to do anymore i have spent alot of money and so much time trying to spy on him but hes working very hard at covering his tracks.

  • Anna

    Looks like this boat may sink with so many of us in it. I highly suspect my husband of having an affair (99.9%). I plan to catch him in the act soon. I also have wondered about retrieving his deleted texts, but have been scared to call the phone co. since the bill is in his name. I can make changes the acct. anytime, but I doubt they would forward the calls without the acct. holder’s permission or knowledge.

  • John

    Why don’t these people just get a divorce and find someone else with whom they can be honest with?

  • Al Bruckner

    Best way, hands down, to log the cell phone stuff is to use FlexiSPY or a similar app. It doesn’t matter if he deletes the messages or not, they’re still recorded as they happen.

    Website is http://www.flexispy.com if you’re interested.